Dad’s Panicked Texts To His Wife About Their Toddler Vomiting In The Car Are Hilarious
A dad decided to document the unfortunate (but hilarious) events that unfolded when his poorly toddler threw up in his car.
Ben Patterson, from California, US, was driving home with his son Declan while his wife went out with her friends for dinner.
But he wasn’t going to let his wife miss out on the shenanigans he had to deal with.
“So this just happened,” Patterson wrote in a text to his wife after sending a picture of their son with vomit all down himself.
“I just threw up trying to clean him. It smells SO BAD.”
Patterson uploaded screenshots of the messages to his wife on Facebook, none of which she replied to, (because who wants to read that when they’re out for dinner).
“Call me,” Patterson continued.
“I’m standing on the side of the road dry heaving, I can’t even be in that car it’s so awful.
“I’m puking on some lady’s lawn and she came out and asked me if I’m drunk.”
But seeing as his wife wasn’t replying, Patterson decided to make things a bit more dramatic.
“This is so bad. And now the cops have turned up,” he wrote.
“Aaaand now there’s a breathalyser. You owe me so big!”
The dad’s post, uploaded on 13 May, has had nearly 160,000 shares in just five days.
When his post began going viral, Patterson admitted some parts of the story were added for dramatic effect.
“I just wanted to clarify that while the rest of the story is true, the part about the police coming and the breathalyser was just something I added for dramatic effect for my wife in the moment,” he wrote.
“Now that the story has blown up, I wouldn’t want anyone to think badly of the Burlingame Police Department because I was joking.
“The truth counts. I actually went down to Burlingame PD and chatted with them and we had a good laugh about it.”
Since the vomiting incident, Patterson has given his followers a few updates on how he will avoid such situations in the future.
“When I get off this flight I’m grabbing a few of these bad boys to stash in the minivan,” he wrote alongside two photos of sick bags.
“Mostly for me, not the kids.”
And thankfully, Declan is doing completely fine.
“Here’s what he looks like when he’s not covered in his own puke,” Patterson added.
“And he’s pretty darn cute if I do say so myself.”