Parents To Be

Mum Doesn’t Want To Give Her Baby Girl Her Partner’s ‘Perfect’ Surname, Asks If She’s Being Unreasonable

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A mum has appealed to the internet for advice asking whether she’s being unreasonable for not wanting to give her partner’s surname to their daughter.

Mumsnet user Brooks10 said her daughter is due “any day” and she and her partner have decided on a first name, but are struggling with the surname.

They are not married, and her partner wants their children to have his surname, which is ‘Perfect’.

“It’s not unreasonable to think that’s not a great surname is it?” she wrote on the Mumsnet thread. “He thinks it’s a great surname to have, so which is it?” 

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Mumsnet

The mum continued: “Is it a bad or good surname to have?

“I think it’s really bad to be honest. Mind you, it wouldn’t sound that great hyphenated either, does it?”

The responses from people on Mumsnet were very mixed. Some felt she should just take his surname, others thought flipping a coin would be a good idea and another camp of mums said to use it double-barreled.

“It is unusual, but if he has managed his whole life with it then I guess she can,” one person wrote. “It might not be too bad hyphenated, depends on what it’s paired with.”

Another wrote: “Flip a coin. Ultimately it’s your say as he can’t register her without you. I would like to see mum’s surname given as default though.”

Some firmly believed she should give her daughter her own surname (not knowing what it is).

One person wrote: “I’d give her your surname. I’m led to believe that it’s simple enough to change to his in the future, but not so simple to change back should you decide to do so.

“I was born before my parents were married and had my mum’s surname. I always liked being the same as her.”

And one person tried to convince the others that ‘Perfect’ really isn’t a bad surname.

“There’s worse,” she said. “My sister married a Looney. As in that’s his surname. She kept her maiden name and all their children have her maiden name.

“Perfect is similar to Best or Darling… unusual but not unheard of.”

What do you think?

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